Im ironically, optimistically taking a break from hope for a while :)
hope can keep you trapped rather than free, hoping things will get better, hoping somethings gonna come along.
Hope is meant to be something positive, keeping your head up, well ive decided to scrap that hope, ironically in hope for freedom.
i had the strangest of dreams last night, of which im not going into full detail, however things are changing for me right now, with the move and the (temporary) farewells.
my dream however, i was being chased, around the streets of liverpool, including in bars and shops. The people chasing me where both good and bad and i was keeping low, after stress and stratages to remain unfound i seen a friend in the distance, he was standing in the distance which just happened to be where two of the chasers where. I creapt up to say goodbye, i cautiously creeped along the cobbles, hiding in the shaddows to give my so long before i gave my self up.
i was giving up on my hopes of being free by running and hiding. although it sounds to most that i was taking the easy way out, i stopped running to stop being chased, i was able to be relaxed although paying the concequences didnt occur.
I move in less than two weeks, which at one point i was really excited for, but now i feel like im leaving. its not fear i hold, but i have things that mean more to me here. i feel im jumping rivers to fit things in and pack out my life but im going to miss out on so much.
im off to draw, i dont know what. maybe i'll check the post first and sit in the cold sun as the autumn arrives.